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April 24, 2008

Samantha's story: Grandmother writes book about toddler taken by virus

By Bethany Bray

Samantha Rose Baer loved dancing, Elmo, nursery rhymes and reading. Her first word was "book" — actually "a book," which she thought was one word.

Samantha loved to stand on things that would make her taller. If you skipped a page when you were reading to her, she knew it and would point it out.

It's memories like these that prompted Andover resident Ruth Baer, Samantha's grandmother, to write a book about Samantha's short life. She died of an unexplained virus a year and a half ago. She was 16 months old and her life ended just hours after she started feeling sick.

"Mantha," as her older brother, Jacob, called her, was buried with her favorite stuffed Elmo doll.

"She just loved life. If there's one thing we learned from her it's to love life, because she sure did," said Baer.

Baer's book, "Samantha Rose," will be released on April 25, Samantha's birthday. Baer wrote the book as a way to grieve, remember her granddaughter and possibly help others deal with loss, she said.

"She was the kind of child you didn't have to teach, she'd just pick it up," said Baer. "The amount of love in her, you don't always see in children. Samantha wouldn't give just one kiss, but kisses all over your face. She loved to dance. She had a smile that just drew her to you."

"Samantha Rose" is a children's book, written through the eyes of Baer's grandson, Jacob, who was 31/2 when his sister died. The book is filled with family photographs taken by Baer's husband, Martin, rather than with illustrations.

"Samantha made you happy," said Martin Baer of his granddaughter. "She had a glow about her."

Baer's book has the feel of a family photo album. The narrator, Samantha's brother, talks about how they used to draw on the driveway with chalk and watch school buses go by, and about their favorite ice cream flavors.

"You were my playmate, and I was your hero," writes Baer, through the voice of Jacob.

Ruth and Martin Baer have lived in Andover for 39 years. She retired last June after a 30-year career as special education teacher in the Andover public schools. Martin Baer retired two months ago as well.

The Baers' two children, Jonathan and Andrea, grew up in Andover. Samantha Rose was Jonathan Baer's daughter. Jonathan Baer and his family live in Westborough. "Grandma and Pa," Samantha's names for Ruth and Martin Baer, visit or baby-sit once or twice a week, the couple said. Jacob, who is turning 5 on May 12, is now their only grandchild.

Samantha's parents are still too grief-stricken to read "Samantha Rose," but they will someday, "when they're ready," Ruth Baer said.

"The grieving process takes a long time and everybody does it in a different way. It just takes time," Baer said.

Baer wrote "Samantha Rose" over the course of one year, and always kept a favorite photograph on her desk of her holding her granddaughter as inspiration.

"I knew it was something I had to do. I just didn't want her to be forgotten," she said of penning the book. "I focused on the life we had, not on the life we will not have."

Writing it helped her with grief she describes as being "like a bad dream." Writing — especially writing for children — came easy to her, she said, because of her background in education.

When the book was finished, Baer connected with Vern Firestone, a publisher for Triad Publishing Group, who spoke at an author's night event near Ruth and Martin Baer's vacation home in Sarasota, Fla.

Firestone liked Baer's ideas for a book about Samantha, and "it just fell into place," Baer said.

Baer is donating proceeds from sales of the book to a fund set up in Samantha's name for research on children's viruses at Children's Hospital in Boston.

The book is for "anyone that's had any kind of loss," Baer said, no matter what age, as well as those close to someone with a loss, who might not know what to say or do.

"It's a story about love and loss. You have to pick up the pieces and grieve in your own way. You have to take your time," she said.

Jacob still talks about his sister. On a recent airplane ride to Florida, Jacob asked if they were going to be able to see Samantha in heaven because they were flying so high.

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Meet the author

— Ruth Baer will be doing a book signing of "Samantha Rose" at Borders Bookstore in Methuen on Saturday, May 3, from noon to 2 p.m. The bookstore is in the Loop shopping plaza, 90 Pleasant Valley St., Methuen.

— Proceeds from the sale of "Samantha Rose" will go to a fund set up in Samantha's name for research on children's viruses at Children's Hospital in Boston.

— The book goes on sale April 25, Samantha's birthday.

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Samantha's story: Grandmother writes book about toddler taken by virus
by By Bethany Bray , , Thu Apr 24, 2008, 06:10 AM EDT
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