Grinding, a sexually-evocative dance maneuver, is prominent enough at Andover High School dances that some parents are asking school officials to do something about it.
On Monday, parents, high school administrators and students on the senior board gathered at the high school to discuss the issue at a meeting hosted by the high school's Parent Advisory Council. By the end of the evening, the conversation had gravitated to what seemed to be an underlying issue: alcohol consumption, and how severe a problem it is at Andover High School.
"Some parents wrote me about the type of dancing their children were coming home describing," said Tom Sharkey, Andover High interim principal. The prevailing message from parents was that the behavior, which to some seems offensive and purely sexually-motivated, should be stopped. "It was a very strong, definitive message at some points saying that [completely stopping the practice] is something I should do by executive order. That is not my style, nor is it the way for our community."
Grinding, a form of dancing popular throughout the country, has become enough of an issue in high schools that some districts have responded by either banning the practice or prohibiting dance events altogether. Also known by older generations as "freak dancing," the dance typically involves partners rubbing or pretending to rub against each other. Typically, a female dance partner rubs her buttocks over a male partner's crotch as their bodies move together in unison.
Though no parents, students or administrators directly detailed what exactly students at Andover High are doing when they grind, some described it as "dirty dancing" while others offered that it simulates sexual intercourse.
As complaints and opposition to the dance maneuver escalated after two recent school dances, Sharkey met with members of sophomore, junior and senior class leadership to discuss the situation, he said.
Sean McCall, a member of the high school's senior board, said "a lot of us were surprised that it came up."
"In our talking, I think a lot of our main points were that we can understand where a lot of parents and students are coming from," said McCall. "It's obviously not a swing dance. It's not a tango. It is a bit more intimate than traditional dances."
At the PAC meeting, McCall and other members of the senior board explained there seems to be a line where grinding moves from an area of being socially driven to being sexually driven. Many students don't cross that line, he said.
"We don't necessarily process what you guys are processing," said McCall, to parents. "It's not like having sex with clothes on."
Generally, that line is only crossed when alcohol is a factor, according to McCall.
"When people get too into it, you can usually tell. It is usually when they're under the influence of alcohol," said McCall.
From that point on, the meeting largely discussed alcohol and drug use at the school, specifically surrounding dance events. In most cases, administrators said, drinking takes place before, not during, the dances. Chaperones also play an active role keeping students in check and weeding out anybody getting carried away, but some parents suggested that more needs to take place.
Overall, the meeting started a conversation that Sharkey said will continue. In the meantime, there are no plans to stop holding dances, he said.
"We will continue these conversations with the parents, students and teachers and take tonight's thoughts and mold them into proposals to bring back to parents, to students and faculty for approval," said Sharkey, "so we are in a better place come June than we are right now."
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Are you concerned about the use of drugs and alcohol by students in Andover's school system, and would you be willing to play a role in a future story on this topic? If so, please email dluca@andovertownsman.com or call 978-475-7000, extension 8723.
