To the editor:
I have been sitting, crying and thinking for the past few days about the state of our nation and our world. I truly think people don’t get what it’s like to live in fear every day.
When I wake up in the morning and get ready to go out and about my day, there is always a lingering thought in the back of my head: Is this the day I don’t make it back home? I wake up knowing that I have to make myself less threatening for fear that someone will take my expressionless face or in-thought face as being hostile.
I know going into a store that I get clocked by security almost immediately upon entering. I ignore the fact that the same employee has been hovering behind me throughout my entire time in the store. I’m highly aware as people pull their purses or bags or even their kids a little closer when I walk by.
The few times I’ve been pulled over, it’s taken everything in me to not start crying or thinking that I am going to die because my taillight is out. Even when out with my friends, I’m hyper-aware that my life could end because of the color of my skin.
I’m lucky that I am somewhat protected by white privilege because I have white parents. I know when I walk into their house at the end of the day, I can let my guard down and breathe a little easier because I know them and their privilege protects me.
But I’m also terrified to move out because once I’m on my own how do I know I’m not gonna be the next Breonna Taylor, shot and killed in her own home?
I don’t want to live like this anymore. I don’t want to know that when I leave my house, my parents are worried that it’s the last time they could see me.
I don’t want to see Black people’s deaths being filmed and posted everywhere because it seems to be the only way we are believed when we say we are being killed.
I want human rights to matter more than looted stores and broken windows.
I want my life and the lives of my fellow black sisters and brothers to matter.
We need to do and be better — all of us